When is the right time to have a child? I always planned out a few things that are not super compatible with having a child: Starting a company Riding a motorbike from London to Sydney Riding a motorbike across Europe into Mongolia via Iran Flying the first hydrogen powered aeroplane from Australia to Europe While some of these can still be done with a child the motorbike trips and flying are a bit too risky. So we have to bring some kind of ordering into this decision making process. We can fly planes when we are 60, we can ride motorbikes at 50 if we look after ourselves, having a child has a shorter timeline that if missed is not reverseable.
After a lunch time catch up with some friends and a beer or two who also happened to be on holiday in Bali I returned to our hotel, my girlfriend acting a little suspiciously pulled out what at first I thought was a foreign COVID test but was a pregnancy test. At first I was shocked, is this real? Is the test a cheap foreign one that does't work, and a few other thoughts of denial. Quickly this turned to a "do we keep it" thought but I knew my girlfriend wanted a child. We hugged and just layed on the bed thinking for a while. My thoughts covered the range of: What if the child is born with defects? How will this change our relationship? What if I convince her to abort? How will this affect our finances? How will this affect my free time? Is the test legit? This is a lot to process.
Even before the last few weeks my girlfriend has brought up the prospect of having children, I never saw myself as a father, I am not sure why, any other girl who brought this up I would have instantly told them a hard no. This girlfriend is different, I can spend 2 weeks on holidays with her and enjoy her company the whole time, if there is a right person to be with it is definitely her, if there is ever a right person to have a child with it is definitely her. But even with that I just never saw myself having a child, I am not sure why, is it the feeling of being tied down, of less flexibility in doing what I want whenever I want? Is it the holidays, motorbike trips, adventures that I can't do with a child? I am sure this is a new adventure in it's own right, but it is definitely going to be different. Am I just scared of change? Or is it the time commitment? Realisticly 18 years where more of my time is going to be devoted to selflessness instead of just being focused on wha
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